A post in the “Don’t Fuck This Up” series. In reply to comment 25 by otou-san.
I’ve been asked to create one of the most difficult but epic posts imaginable – I have to take the list of my top 100 favorite anime characters (completely revamped for this post) and get into the bones of how each of them is a mirror of the nature of otaku, then draw a parallel between them and my own otakudom as well as… the first episode of Crest of the Stars?! Because there is so much detail on so many characters, I’ve split the post into twenty parts which I will be posting over the next nineteen days. I certainly hope you enjoy reading this most insane of posts!
100. Lelouch Lamperouge (from Code Geass)
Why I Like Him: Lelouch is a beautiful bastard. He knows what he wants out of the world, and he’ll do anything in his power to get it. However, he isn’t totally arrogant. He knows the weight of his actions, and he knows that there’s a chance he may fail, but he pushes forward without letting fear get the best of him.
A Mirror For Otaku: The case has been made for Lelouch before (A post I couldn’t find after 20 minutes of searching), but I will re-demonstrate how he is a perfect mirror for otaku. Lelouch is a bit anti-social, only really approaching the people who seem to attach themselves to him. He only talks to larger amounts of people through his more badass persona, Zero (an internet handle if I’ve ever heard one.) He’s cynical and highly intelligent, but it’s not like he detests humanity entirely – he just hates what they do with themselves.
All of his friends are more physically fit than him by a long shot, but he’s a chess master and knows brilliant tactics as well as the basics of mech piloting. He also has a ‘moe imouto‘ who he tries to protect with everything he has.
Reflecting My Otakudom: As Lelouch mirrors most otaku, he also mirrors myself. I am a self-confident, tactical intellectual who, like Lelouche, is excellent at gathering people to lead. You could compare Lelouch’s building an army to my own efforts in building a network of friends and systematically turning them all into otaku.
The First Episode of Crest of the Stars: In the first episode of CotS, Jinto’s father makes a treaty with the alien race, the Abh, by choosing himself as the leader of his planet’s people as per the Abh’s request. Lelouch similarly seeks to unite the world through methods which would put himself at the throne.
99. Haruhara Haruko (from FLCL)
Why I Like Her: Haruko is a crazy bitch who’s selfish, pushy, and manipulative, but always to hilarious effect. She is a master of gags and puns and wields a badass bass guitar with which to beat the manhood out of all the boys. Great fun.
A Mirror For Otaku: Every otaku can be a bit (or very) selfish at times. Many NEETs continue to live with their parents who continue to take care of all of their living expenses, which the otaku abuse with their constant use of electronics and internet service. Not to mention the barrels of expensive snack foods it takes to feed otaku. Even worse are ones who let their parents pay for them to live in an apartment!
Reflecting My Otakudom: I happen to be one of those jobless, selfish bums living with my parents and using all their electricity. Worse still, I am a horribly manipulative bastard. I am known for the fact that I can get my brothers and friends to get just about anything for me unless they are in a bad mood. I’m also sort of a cunt. As for my otakudom, like Haruko’s pushy self, I force anime on countless people.
The First Episode of Crest of the Stars: Haruko is an enigma, much as the Abh were to the humans in CotS. In both cases, the defense force of the invaded planet thinks that there’s a chance for them to fight the aliens, be they the Abh or Haruko, but they aren’t really sure what could be hidden up the enemy’s sleeve.
98. Fuura Kafuka (from Sayonara Zetsubou Sensei)
Why I Like Her: Kafuka is hiding some dark secrets and may actually be the craziest character in SZS. Her life has been so horrid that she has learned to see everything in a positive light to combat the darkness. As such, she is sunny, fun, and cute, but with great purpose.
A Mirror for Otaku: Underneath the cynical, misanthropic shell of an otaku is a positive side. It’s the part of them that allows them to love a message like “believe in you who believes in me!” and love shows like Hidamari Sketch and Manabi Straight. Kafuka may seem silly sometimes, but I think we all really wish we could have such simple, silly thoughts.
Reflecting My Otakudom: I have seen a lot of anime, and a lot of it has been really terrible. After some of the worst, you’d think I’d become a cynical jerk who doesn’t like most anime, but instead, I still take a positive attitude towards anime itself and try to give everything a chance.
The First Episode of Crest of the Stars: There isn’t all that much to be positive about when an unknown alien race threatens to annihilate your planet, but Jinto’s dad used a more optimistic approach when he took the moral fall to save humanity. Good sport, even if all of his friends hate him for it.
97. Rahzel Anadis (from Hatenkou Yuugi)
Why I Like Her: Rahzel is like the anime version of Juno – a smart, strong, short, and thoroughly strange young woman with a tongue sharper than King Arthur’s blade. Rahzel is a ton of fun and a barrel of laughs if you can keep up with her. Even though she’s a bit harsh, though, she can be polite around normal people, and a force to be reckoned with to enemies.
A Mirror For Otaku: Hatenkou Yuugi is a very shoujo anime that would probably be more receptive to a female audience. What I think girl otaku will find in Rahzel is a refreshing, respectable, and relatable leading lady. Like an otaku, she’s very misunderstood and somewhat incomprehensible, but she rises above all of the haters and spins people around her fingers like a champ, which any strong girl could admire.
Reflecting My Otakudom: Rahzel travels with two older, very pretty men who match her blow for blow in intelligence and wit, but with totally different personalities from the filter of age and experience. Much like Rahzel, I am a snappy young anime blogger who finds myself talking to older, snappier bloggers, and it takes the full extent o my wit and tact to match blows with them (while on the side I bowl over regular people like nobody’s business).
The First Episode of Crest of the Stars: Rahzel spends most of her time in conversations, and that talkative tendency runs rampant in the first episode of CotS. The episode is almost entirely consumed by dialog, either expository in nature or relative to plot happenings; In that regard, it is really the opposite of Rahzel, but the never-closing mouths remain a similarity.
96. Sousuke Sagara (from Full Metal Panic)
Why I Like Him: Sousuke is hilarious with his raised-by-wolves (or rather dogs?) personality and social ignorance, but being funny alone wouldn’t get him spot #96. What makes Sousuke great is his sense of situations and understanding of personalities. Even if he doesn’t understand why his actions cause problems and make Chidori rage, he does understand when he’s done something wrong and has a sense of people’s thoughts – a powerful tool when you are socially ignorant and have a tsun-tsun love interest.
A Mirror For Otaku: As I said before, Sousuke has no social skills whatsoever, which is true for most otaku. He’s also really big on military stuff, not just because he was raised with it, but because he really likes it – Plus he has his own hobbies like fishing that he can loose himself in. Sousuke’s simple-minded and straightforward interests along with his tactically brilliant thought process make him a great match for otaku
Reflecting My Otakudom: Sousuke has a tendency to involve his passion for military and security in the wrong parts of civilian life, just as I tend to do with my anime fandom. I tend to expect a certain understanding and open-mindedness from people that I can’t always get for my hobby, and it can lead to hilarious situations of my social ineptitude.
The First Episode of Crest of the Stars: Sousuke takes a very professional approach to everything he deals with. He doesn’t fuck around and adheres quite strictly to protocol. The Abh have similar tendencies as they don’t fuck around with the people of the planets they invade – ‘surrender or die,’ period.
There’s 100-96, tune in tomorrow for the next five! We’ve got a boy with a metal arm, a revolutionary girl, and who knows – maybe your favorite character!
oh my god
you’ve taken this too far
What has science done?
EPIC. This is soooo fucking far beyond too far your ass went around the world to find your own penis again.
More like flying-around-the-Earth-backwards-to-go-back-in-time-to-remind-himself-to-set-the-DVR too far.
I’m starting to think I’m not the only aniblogger who badly needs a job to get him away from his blog. Regardless, please continue. I want to see how long you can keep this pace up before you break.
I’m going to the end of the universe, baby!
Also that Sousuke pic is fucking gay ARGH
If Haruko is 99 on your list, I can’t wait to see who’s on your top 10. Next 19 days will be fun.
Well, not that I’m a huge Haruko fan, but yes, there’s so much more to come. I hope it’s as fun as you expect!
WHOA YOU DIDN’T FUCK THIS UP, YOU’RE A WINNER, GO GO GO.
I can’t wait to see how this keeps up, or ends for that matter.
IT ENDS AT 8 POSTS WHEN/WITH LOLHOMEWORK.
IMMA PROPHET I TELL YOU.
so little faith you have, young one. (erm, old one) I swear on my own life to finish this series!
Damn, you get a 100 points for even being able to categorize a 100 characters. I am thoroughly impressed.
You fucked this up. I recognize all those characters; therefore the list is not otaku enough.
No YOU fucked this up. This is all the way back at the last level, therefore the popular characters are here. The farther we get, the more obscure. Also, Rahzel is totally obscure, you just happen to be one of the ten people who’ve heard of her.
Holy shit, this is awesome. If you actually pull this off, you will have thoroughly earned my respect, digiboy.
Respecting digiboy will fuck him up and turn him into a self-congratulatory slutwhore. Keep him in pain and the posts remain beautiful. AMIRITE LOLIKITS?
I think it’s more like, keep him on a steady incline of respect and don’t let him have it all at once. If he never feels like he’s gaining any, he gives up.
what have I dooooooooooone
That picture of Lelouch cracks me up every time I see it. He would be a pretty awesome Vegas magician.
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