In Which I Acknowledge The Mistakes of My Youth – Queen's Blade Episode One

I think all of us look back on some things we’ve said before and ask ourselves ‘what the fuck was I thinking when I said that?’ This seems to be the case for me when it comes to any of my first impression posts from past seasons, perhaps because I hadn’t found the secret to writing them yet. Something about the Spring 2009 season must have made me hyper-critical, it seems. Was I trying to look cool in front of my then-emerging readership? Was I just in a particularly picky mood then? What was this pretentiousness encroaching on me, that positively DRIPS from most of the posts I made at the time? (see: Saki ep 1 post, fully apologized for here.) I’m not really sure, but I can safely say that after watching the first episode of Queen’s Blade, my ‘impression’ post on it is easily the worst fucking post I’ve ever written in my life.

Maybe I would have finished the episode if hadn’t watched it with No Name, or if I hadn’t watched it with fake subs (not that it made it too hard to understand, as even the subs I used this time were fucking horrible babblefish-esque subs and I got everything being said) or if I hadn’t watched it with the pre-disposition that it was ONLY going to be worth watching for the fanservice; then I would have finished the episode. The only complaint that I won’t redact from that old post is that I still don’t like the character designs much, but it’s okay, because I’ve realized that there are far better reasons to watch this show than masturbating.

First I want to clear up my biggest issue with that old post – did I really insult the voice acting in this show? I guess back then I was probably just getting into voice acting and maybe I didn’t really understand it as much. But Rie Kugimiya was AWESOME in this episode. I’m a big-time Kugimiya fanboy, and I love, love, love any opportunity for her to show some of her range and awesomeness. Aya Hirano was also great as the blue-haired angel girl, who was just cute and fun to listen to. I also loved Elina’s voice, who was played by none other than the fucking almighty Kaori Mizuhashi. Seriously, what was I high on in that other post? Fuck the me that wrote that shit.

The next good reason to watch it is the fun fantasy stylings. Queen’s Blade 1 doesn’t do a lot to explain it’s world, but shows that it’s something pretty big and interesting. I of course would not have known this on my first watching wherein all I’d had time to see was a cliffside and a desert, but I liked the look of the castle town and the big, weird moon-thingies floating around. We’ve also got the potential for totally out-there monsters, considering that Kugimiya’s thing was a blob-girl who shoots explosive acid from her tits. And that’s all I need to say about that, lol.

But none of that is the best reason to watch this show, which is that it’s actually pretty damn well-done! Ignoring the cliche dialog and thinking past the fact that the camera is hugging the tits and pussy of each girl all the time (which isn’t really a problem, if you actually like the character designs then the fanservice would be considered very well-handled. It’s no surprise that director Kinji Yoshimoto is a frequent porn director. I haven’t seen all of his, but Another Lady Innocent is a classic and I really liked) what you’ll find is that the episode is actually very well-constructed. It’s paced so fast that the episode literally flies by and keeps the action going and the questions rolling all coupled with some surprisingly great music and animation that, while not great, is by no means bad. There were some particularly memorable moments that made it that much more interesting to watch (the scene wherein Kugimiya appears outside of Leina’s window and says some stuff before making an extremely creepy rape-face sticks out very prominently in my mind.)

But best of all, the show is just hilarious! I mean come on, Reina beats Kugimiya by falling on her, clogging up her boobs, and causing them to keep growing until they fucking explode. When I saw that moment, I truly and utterly knew what a mistake I’d made when I dropped this show 9 months ago – if I had just stuck around till the end of the episode – if I’d just wiped away that pretentiousness when it mattered – I could have seen this amazing moment and talked about this show back when it was airing.

I am acknowledging this mistake of my youth right now – the post I made on Queen’s Blade episode one 9 months ago was stupid, pretentious, and no longer applies to my thoughts on the show. Baka-Raptor, I just have to say, you were right all along, and I’m glad I listened to you now. Thank you.

9 thoughts on “In Which I Acknowledge The Mistakes of My Youth – Queen's Blade Episode One

    • When I was reading through my archives the other day, I noticed that there were periods as far back as early 08 in which I was writing really well and obviously into what I was talking about, and other periods as late as 09 in which I wrote like an idiot with no idea what I was saying. Just goes to show, you should always cool your head off before going to blog something.

  1. 3rd paragraph down….just brilliant writing sir, and completely correct.

    That being said, Queen’ Blade was awesome for a myriad of reasons, including story. Personally I liked it a lot and I’m glad you have finally reached enlightenment regarding this issue.

    • I stand by my opinion on Diamond Dust Rebellion. I never should have watched that movie. That said, on your end this does make up for it~

  2. (deep breath) Okay, fine… The breast acid thing really gives me pause, but both you and Yi are raving about it now, so I’ll try it. I’m queuing up the first episode now.

    • Hahaha. It’s all a matter of… taking it seriously, but not taking it seriously, I guess. There seems to be a movement to watch it right now, seeing as Haiku Anime Review has been watching it at the same speed as I have, interestingly.

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